the funniest thing you have said on a poker table .

[byronkincaid]

I once said "gg" at the end of a sng but i think the other guy had left already.

You should have been there, it was amazing.

I once said "ty u2" at the start of a sit n go after someone had said "good luck everybody"
It was a long time ago, I didn't even think about it beforehand, it just came out.

Have blocked chat ever since that day. I had to decide whether to concentrate on being an online poker player or a modern day Oscar Wilde.

if you never chat there's a chance you'll be reported as being a bot.

also a fish may get a bit disgruntled when you don't say ty when he says nh and not play another game

also he may call you down lighter than he would if you were friendly (in a sng I believe this loses you equity)

intelligent live pro's are friendly to fish, no reason not to be online imo

[Grier78]

Don't say much myself, but once heard Kinboshi say raise....



He was joking obviously

Not True, "indisputable" evidence below:

Table "TURBO" Rust
Seat 1: MreY88 ($21.07 in chips)
Seat 3: ilveroasso ($42.28 in chips)
Seat 5: jknk ($13.72 in chips)
Seat 6: Kinboshi ($54.97 in chips) DEALER
Seat 8: DaCoolG ($34.95 in chips)
Seat 10: Franky4Dita ($11.68 in chips)
DaCoolG: Post SB $0.25
Franky4Dita: Post BB $0.50
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Kinboshi [SA ]
MreY88: Fold
ilveroasso: Fold
jknk: Call $0.50
Kinboshi: Raise $2.00
DaCoolG: Fold
Franky4Dita: Call $2.00
jknk: Fold
*** FLOP *** [ ]
Franky4Dita: Bet $0.50
Kinboshi: Fold
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $4.50 Rake $0.21
Franky4Dita: Shows [H10 ]
Franky4Dita: wins $4.29

Obviously the turn and river were going to be runner runner 10's, so its a good fold on the flop.

[bolt pp]

"yeah sort of"

i hadent been asleep in a couple of days and thats what i said when someone said to me: "it's your turn"

i have no idea what i thought he was saying

[Dewi_cool]

I think I said 'fold' once

[GreekStein]

In Vegas last year I'm heads-up in a pot with a young miss sat right opposite me.  The action is on me, but first I take a long look at her and she sees my eyes going up and down and side to side and thinks I'm counting her chips.  She tells she has about 15,000 chips.  I says to her, I says deadpan, I says, "I'm not counting your chips, I'm looking at your tits."  The guy next to me though is her husband and elbows me in the face...the floor man wearing cowboy boots starts kicking me in the kidneys when I'm on the floor and the guy in the 8 seat who's the girls father jabs me in the throat with his walking stick and throws his coffee in my eyes.  Hilarious it was.

Or did you want real stories?

more love imo!

[MC]

I was on the left of Vanessa Rousso in a tournament a couple of years ago. We were both table chip leaders at the time, and I flatted her EP raise with AK, it came down like T72. Both checked. She bet the 6 turn, and I called (thought good chance I was ahead). River 7 and she checks. I check back saying "I think we have the same hand".... She was like "I really don't think we do" and flipped over 77 for quads.

That was kinda funny at the time...

[ACE2M]

'f**k you bas***d' in a chinese accent.
'Wahey we've won the tournament' when someone who is a known donator to the cash game wins whatever tournament is on

are catchphrses from my local cash game that make me laugh.

[vinni]

i was sat in the balagio last year ,Micky wernick was on my table .
after asking him where he was going that night ,he told me he was going to see Celine Dion (don't know how if that's right ) ,to which i replied id love to give her one ,suddenly the table went quite .
after what seemed like 1 minute  (it must have been 10 seconds) the table started laughing .
un be knowing to me the  small Greek man was sitting to my left was her husband.
god i know how to put my foot in it.

[MANTIS01]

There was this real comedian at the table once. When the action got round to him he spent ages looking at his cards and fiddling with his chips. Then he'd pick up his whole stack and wave it in the air before shouting "I'M ALLLLL.....". Then he'd fold his cards, and say...OUT". Yeah, that was well feckin funny mate. The only thing funnier than this was when you did it for the 10th time.   

[sovietsong]

This is a beauty. A guy on my table got it all in pre with JTs vs my AA, he sucked out and I said 'wp', but it wasn't well played at all. In fact he played the hand very badly. Then he said ty and I lost my temper and did my bollocks.

Wp

[mondatoo]

This is a beauty. A guy on my table got it all in pre with JTs vs my AA, he sucked out and I said 'wp', but it wasn't well played at all. In fact he played the hand very badly. Then he said ty and I lost my temper and did my bollocks.

Wp

LOL ppl do this a lot very com

[vinni]

There was this real comedian at the table once. When the action got round to him he spent ages looking at his cards and fiddling with his chips. Then he'd pick up his whole stack and wave it in the air before shouting "I'M ALLLLL.....". Then he'd fold his cards, and say...OUT". Yeah, that was well feckin funny mate. The only thing funnier than this was when you did it for the 10th time.   

you ,who is you.

[Royal Flush]

Please don't let Barry sit down, he is too good for all of us.

[GreekStein]

I don't know if anyone knows a black Richard from Nottingham gala who used to be part of the furniture in the cash games. An absolute gent who's heavy Jamaican accented speech was legendary at the table. Every time he came out with one of his  'me a hit a trip trees maaan' it was abs golden.

One night we made a rule (Maria and Redbull were also playing - not sure if any other blondes PeteL or LittleMissC were in the game) where you couldn't claim a pot or make any action without doing so in a Jamaican accent. Anyone joining the game, Chinese, Indian, English, Old, Young, male or female had to abide by the rules.

Any blondes know if Richard is still about?

[jakally]

If he's the same one, plays reg. £1/£2 at DTD.

Tighter than a very tight thing.