Ok, the story, as brief as I can, and as much detail as I can.
Might not seem as important, as it will be a 3 year story, cut short into hopefully a couple of paragraphs max.
3 years ago, random woman contacts me on fb. She says she knows ny dad & uncle. Tells me to say Hi to them etc. Fine. I do that. No prob.
Then another message. Tell your mum & dad that if they want to come for the weekend, they are welcome etc. Fine, I do this.
Dad says to Mum, they should go. Mum says no chance, happy for him to go, but don't come back
Turns out, woman is contacting me on behalf of her sister, who was a complete bunny boiler, and wanted my dad to run away with her when me and my sister were little. Mum sorts the prob out. End of.
Fast forward to last year, my mum dies, I start getting messages from this woman again, firstly, pass on condolences etc. I reply, saying thanks, will do. Just before the funeral, I then get messages telling me to pass on her number, as her sister would like to call him. I ignore, then I get told that I HAVE to get my dad to contact her, and another message along similar lines. I reply saying he is out the country, will pass on the message.
That wasn't good enough, she then goes to my cousin and gets the number of him. Total lack of respect.
Anyway, they speak, which my dad tells me about, and all is OK. Probably spoke regularly, I'm fine with that.
Forward to November last year. He goes to Malta.. Nothing unusual with that. He rings me the day after and says he is going to Gozo with his his mate. Fine.
Two days later his mate (who doesn't speak English) phones my dad's house whilst I'm there, we can't really converse, but if he is ringing me, then it's not gonna be good news, right? I try to ring my dad, no answer on the house phone in Malta, and his mobile is switched off. I fear the worst.
4 hours later, another guy phones, looking for my dad, turns out he hasn't told any of his friends he was going to Malta, so when I tell them he is there, they are a bit confused. Manage to get through to him the next day and he is adamant he is there with his friend. LOL. He tells me his friend is having a great time etc. So I tell him, his friend got someone to ring me, to let me know his friend's sister had died. Ooops, now he has been rumbled. So he admits he is not with him etc, and is with this woman and her two mates. We have a massive argument. I am furious. I'm ready to go over there, and kill him. And I mean kill him. Stupid.
Anyway, eventually it blows over, I pick him up from the airport and we discuss, and that is that. I know he is gonna speak to her etc, I can't and wouldn't want to control that. It's not my place. And I tell my sister to take the same attitude. She agrees.
Then we get to christmas time, just after. My dad isn't looking forward to NYE, he used to sit up with my mum til after the bells, and have a drink or two. Literally. I understand this is gonna be difficult. I ask him if he would like to go to Malta, he says its only 5 days away, it's too rushed for him, lol. I leave it, but agree that we will go for dinner on NYE. A few days before, I'm on my way back from Somerset, I get a call from my sister telling me he is going away for a few days, with this woman and her family, back NYD. I'm furious again.
I phone him, tell him he is a *****, tell him him if he does that then he does not have a son when he comes back. It's up to him. An hour later he phones to say he is def going away. Fine. His choice IMO.
A day later we speak, go over the same old stuff, I tell him that he has really fked me off, especially as he has blown us out on NYE, because he got a better offer. He rambles on. I do a gatso and call bullshit on his pathetic excuses. Posted the rest of the convo here a few weeks ago, so no need to repeat.
I then get a text from him just after the bells, LOL, he can barely make a call on his phone. I tell him again, not to contact me, and a few other things..
Now, the things that I'm annoyed at.
For the last year or so, I have chauffered him everywhere, with some assistance from my sister from time to time. I'm happy to have done this, and wouldn't have it any other way. But now, he is suddenly capable of walking over a mile to the bus stop, getting buses and trains to travel to meet this woman and her family. A woman that my mum hated, and would have hated for him to be seeing. He knows this, but denies it, because it suits him. He hasn't been to see his grandchildren this year, because no one has given him a lift to see them. He lives 15 mins away by car. Or an hour on the bus. But is capable of travelling 2 hours to meet this woman, and her family. He hasn't been to the cemetry this year, because it's too far to get there on his own. Again, laughable.
He couldn't go to Malta because 5 days wasn't long enough to book a flight and get packed, but apparently getting packed for 3 days away at the drop of a hat, cancelling the plans you had with your children & grandchildren, is possible.
I've probably missed some bits, and not given enough detail, it's long enough as it is, and difficult to remember it all.
Right or wrong, I have said that whilst he wants to meet this woman, then I'm not interested in helping him, or seeing him. He is adamant that he will not stop seeing her, or speaking to her. It's his choice.
Am i way off here?
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