Prose from a Poshboy

[CHIPPYMAN]

She'll learn who Frankie is. ISSS IT

[Tal]

Now get on the plane & get u DICK soaked !!!

HAVE A NICE FUCK IN KRAKOW.

+1, give her one for blonde!

One day when she reads back this diary...

Halloo!!!

Ta on just paras täielik dzentelman.

[simonnatur]

Well done Alex. Pleased you cashed, though can imagine also how disappointed you must be. You should be proud of your achievement.

I took on board all everyone has said about insane tourney variance, but you genuinely seem to have a big enough edge to overcome this, even against top quality fields.

[LIONRAMPANT]

Sick Trekkers to cash in both EPT & WPT vwp - enjoy kwakow

[chelseaboy]

Sick Trekkers to cash in both EPT & WPT vwp - enjoy krakow

[cambridgealex]

This is a brutal comedown. A few hours ago I was within 90 players of a million dollars. The equity of my stack was worth over 50 thousand euros. Then on the turn of one card, it was all but over and a few hours later I'm sitting on a train, sharing a compartment with a stranger, on an uncomfortable bed that I've had to make myself!

I kind of expected this trip to be a make or break trip. Not break in that it'd break me, but I was putting quite a lot of funds into what was essential a handful of tournaments, so bricking everything and PJ bricking everything, would've been pretty bad and may've required a step down in stakes for 2013. But the upsides were sure to be worth the risk! Think what could've been if I hold with aces...

But the most likely result, is what has happened. A sweat or two, no big bink, but leaving a small winner. By the most likely, I mean, my expected long term value from the trip, was to be a small winner, rather than a big loser or big winner. But you still approach it thinking "I could easily brick everything" OR "I could win the world".

So I've not left a broken man who never wants to play again, searching his soul for what to do with himself. And nor have I left a millionaire. So the dream is still there, yet to be fulfilled and now I'm looking to the next stop, the next chance for that big score. The game still has me by the balls.

The guy sharing my cabin is a young Brazilian, travelling around Europe on his own. From my own travelling experiences, I reckon this cabin is the height of luxury to him! I've slept many a night in far worse places. I've slept in £1.50 hotels in Africa with rooms smaller than prison cells and beds like a slab of wood, ants crawling about and the odd scorpion.

My room in the jungle in Peru for 2 months had countless bugs and insects in, even a tarantula found its way into my bag once. During our tour of South America we cut our stay in Rio short because the hotels were so expensive. We paid £9 a night. For the record, I'm not saying that I know what it's like to be poor in real terms, I don't - I've been extremely fortunate throughout my life, I'm just saying I remember how tight things were in that year, and how highly I valued small amounts of money.

How things have changed! Now a hotel room for £30 a night each is a bargain and we snub anything budget or "cheap". Winning one or two hundred quid in a night is fobbed off as being a "bowl" and anything +/- £500 feels like a breakeven day now.

What I profited this trip I referred to earlier as a "small profit". If I stepped back and stopped being so spoilt, I'd realise that it is a massive amount to win in 12days. People take months to earn it, and I'm leaving thinking that it's a bowl of rice, and I could've had so much more.

I think I need reality checks sometimes. The amounts of money that fly around the poker world are ridiculous. And we're not exactly the most baller people in the community either. In these circles of EPTs and high stakes cash games, we're actually pretty little fish. Brammer said he'd jump off a bridge if he came 9th in the EPT today. That would be a 60k pay day. They discuss tens of thousands like we discuss thousands, and smaller stakes players discuss hundreds, and muggles discuss tenners!

I don't think these things are too important though in themselves, and being hard on yourself or feeling guilty for being lavish with money is pretty futile and unnecessary. Money is the tool with which we do our job. So we are used to big sums being thrown about. But when you're wasteful with money, that's what I hate. And I think it's important to hate it, because it shows you know the value of it.

I think people in this world can go off the rails extremely easily if they're not careful. Spending time with family or non-poker friends is very important to keep your feet on the ground. Listen to how they talk about and treat money, then when you're going to flick in a £200 spin on roulette, remember what that money can buy in real life and walk away.

This is advice to myself as much as anything, and to anyone that wants to listen.

[buzzharvey22]

Oh well. Pretty gutted, but nothing I could do. Going to see Victoria in Krakow for a few days now. Supposed to be a really nice old city so looking forward to that. Will be a new country too to tick off the chart, and I think my 11th different country visited in 2012!

Wp & ul mate . Now get on the plane & get u DICK soaked !!!
U deserved it . C ya soon in notts .
HAVE A NICE FUCK IN KRAKOW.

POTY IMO

[Tal]

Nice reflection, Alex. Always good to see people who have their feet firmly on the ground.

Hope wherever you are is warmer than -3C. Buddy freezing here.

[chelseaboy]

Your last post was very good... your time will come!

[scotty77]

I think I need reality checks sometimes. The amounts of money that fly around the poker world are ridiculous. And we're not exactly the most baller people in the community either. In these circles of EPTs and high stakes cash games, we're actually pretty little fish. Brammer said he'd jump off a bridge if he came 9th in the EPT today. That would be a 60k pay day. They discuss tens of thousands like we discuss thousands, and smaller stakes players discuss hundreds, and muggles discuss tenners!

I don't think these things are too important though in themselves, and being hard on yourself or feeling guilty for being lavish with money is pretty futile and unnecessary. Money is the tool with which we do our job. So we are used to big sums being thrown about. But when you're wasteful with money, that's what I hate. And I think it's important to hate it, because it shows you know the value of it.

I think people in this world can go off the rails extremely easily if they're not careful. Spending time with family or non-poker friends is very important to keep your feet on the ground. Listen to how they talk about and treat money, then when you're going to flick in a £200 spin on roulette, remember what that money can buy in real life and walk away.

This is advice to myself as much as anything, and to anyone that wants to listen.

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Just fantastic and something I think about a great deal.

[Eso Kral]

Great post Alex and ur honesty and excellent writing skills are why this the best diary on Blonde imo and an absolute must read!!

[JK]

This is something I've discussed with Leanne in the past. Even for me as a dealer, passing around those sums of money, its hard to keep your feet on the ground. That coupled with all my friends being (compared to me) massive ballers, its very difficult to keep things real.

Before I was with Leanne, I'd sit with £400 on a 1/2 game, knowing that was half my wages for a month but not being particularly bothered if I won or lost. If I won, I'd play again, if I lost, I'd just wait until next month. I struggle to do that with £100 now, and if I do win, I'm thinking about the bills I can pay. Its a pretty big reality check when it hits you.

I guess, for me anyway, its important to have people that aren't in the world that I am. That way I can afford to eat a week after payday lol

[david3103]

...I think people in this world can go off the rails extremely easily if they're not careful. Spending time with family or non-poker friends is very important to keep your feet on the ground. Listen to how they talk about and treat money, then when you're going to flick in a £200 spin on roulette, remember what that money can buy in real life and walk away.

This is advice to myself as much as anything, and to anyone that wants to listen.

Love the honesty. Hold tight to the thoughts expressed. Enjoy Krakow. No doubt you'll also looking forward to some form of family Christmas too.

the turn of one card though? I I don't think it's ever actually the turn of one card. Hell, we might focus on that one hand, that one card. I know I did recently, but it's not about just the one card. It's about the way we played, you seemed happy with your game this week and whilst my comments won't mean much to you it seems to me that you have the belief in your ability to confidently play these events in 2013 and beyond. When you win one, it won't be on the turn of one card though.

[rfgqqabc]

...I think people in this world can go off the rails extremely easily if they're not careful. Spending time with family or non-poker friends is very important to keep your feet on the ground. Listen to how they talk about and treat money, then when you're going to flick in a £200 spin on roulette, remember what that money can buy in real life and walk away.

This is advice to myself as much as anything, and to anyone that wants to listen.

I'm listening.

[tikay]

A tremendous Post by Alex there. Every aspiring poker player should print that off & revisit it every day.