An Ape and a notebook, how long will it take?

[jgcblack]

Also, for those who remember and have been with me long enough...

I vowed a while back to play my next DTD event in my Africa shirt.

Cue me playing this weekends Day 1c in a lime green 'tribal' shirt.  For no reason other than when i bought it i knew it deserved to be worn where it could be photographed and targetted. 

Gl me with Tighty and his usual pin sharp accurate barrage of 'friendly banter'
(ill try and keep the crying to the toilets).

[jgcblack]

You can tel when im bored, drunk, or have too much time on my hands...

Coz blonde gets a proper whallop of my opinion, humour and commentary.

Now to work out how to approach Tal in order to say hi but not appear like a stalker at the weekend.....

[jgcblack]

Had a really pleasant night last night with a certain young lady, didn't even realise I was missing a Friday grind.......

Woken up and on my way with a slice of pizza to meet a whole bunch of Hero's in Nandos: Eso, leatherman, Celtic, tl900, jimmyfing etc etc..

Day 22222222!

[jgcblack]

Sat next to Eso (mr right) and obv Tighty comes straight over to 'admire' the shirt...

Got a table with a couple of young guys firing already, Eso and an older guy.

Think I recognise the most active young guy, seat 7.

Kinboshi just joined... Lol

[jgcblack]

Turns out the 'young decent' guy on my table is Ben Vinson, good read John, deep joy.

Eso, Kin, Ben, young aggy kid and a couple of strange ones make up a fun table.. With my direct left empty.. Just need Stato or someone to rock up...

[jgcblack]

Turns out the 'young decent' guy on my table is Ben Vinson, good read John, deep joy.

Eso, Kin, Ben, young aggy kid and a couple of strange ones make up a fun table.. With my direct left empty.. Just need Stato or someone to rock up...

Yeah wasn't Stato, was Nick Hicks though.... Ffs.

Just resisted doing something big vs Ben with the nut blocker in a strangley played hand....
Think I played the hand perfect in retrospect, but when he overpots river I wanted to see his pain when I over reship with the nut blocker... Knowing he's both able to fold good hands, but also able to make good calls.

Decided to not wave my penis at him.

[cambridgealex]

I tried exactly that vs Tom Ambler, shoving over an overbet with nut blocker. Sure worked.

[dwayne110]

Good luck JB, definitely sounds like your kind of table for making moves!

[cambridgealex]

Feel this should be quoted here for the record.

To: MI6

The secret diary of secret agent John "KGB" Black

Security: Top Secret

Title: #realjohnblackupdates

Sub-title: Through the blinds with Agent Black

" I am playing in Nottingham, camoflauged in the brightest Caribbean shirt I can find. Subtext, fool the muggles into thinking I can't play.

Drew an easy table.

Seat 1. Eso Kral. Punter. Doesn't normally wear a shirt. New dad. Sleep deprived
Seat 2 Me. This is a stepping stone to the One Drop event at Vegas in the summer, where I will play disguised as Agent Sam Trickett
Seat 3 Nick Hicks. Seems nice. I have him as weak though. nice is weak. You need to be ruthless, like me crushing 5p-10p online and progressing to..5p-10p on another site
seat 6 Kinboshi. Nice. Nice is weak though. Thanks for the note from Q not to mention religion, speed cameras, homeopathy and Kenny Dalgliish
seat 8 Ben Vinson. Some random. Seems decent but not to my standard

Hand 1

I am in the small blind, my favourite position as they rarely see me coming to outplay them from there. My favourite is the smooth rim float jam that works so well on Friday nights against the Russians.

Nick Hicks raises to 1000 UTG at 200-400

Perfect. Phase one of my deception plan successful. I can now outplay him down the streets

I call. Again, I am nonchalant and flip the chips in like Le Cidre in Casino Royale. I still need to perfect the tears of blood as a reverse tell when I have the nuts though. No mpoint wasting it on these players though. Save it for Danny and Hellmuth in the summer when I amcrushing them.

the flop comes as I expected

10h

I check for deception with the aim to float with flair, dexterity and not a little technique

He c-bets 1,100

Perfect, that phase 3 complete

I call, as to plan

As long as it doesn't come the , as I have him on 2-2.I will float

turn .

Oh, Agent P leno never told me about this spot. I have 100,000 hands on eactly this flop against exactly this type of player and its never come the

I check, exuding strength hiding my inner confusion

He bets 3,600

I look at him, searching for breathing tells as taught to me in basic training by Agent P leno. He doesn't appear to be breathing.

I decide to fold, confident nonetheless that I could float and outplay him on the river if I wanted to


Hand 2

seat 9 raises to 800 on my big blind

I flick through my mental Heada Up display for the page in my manual that prepares me for this

Eso Kral 2050 on the button

I have Q-Q but confident I am up against Aces from the way his chips went into the pot I fold.

The initial raiser calls and check folds on   

I knew I was right to fold!


Hand 3.

Now I am on the button. This is my domain, no one will mess with my button. I am he-john, master of the Black clan, Agent of doom

Will Webster raises to 1,100 UTG

On the button I decide to fold a two way combination post flop monster against this player, to lull him into a false sense of security


Agent Black. Out.

[titaniumbean]

rofl only read first five lines, cant stop laughing. just timed out two pair  it's so good rofl sigh

[tikay]

Feel this should be quoted here for the record.

To: MI6

The secret diary of secret agent John "KGB" Black

Security: Top Secret

Title: #realjohnblackupdates

Sub-title: Through the blinds with Agent Black

" I am playing in Nottingham, camoflauged in the brightest Caribbean shirt I can find. Subtext, fool the muggles into thinking I can't play.

Drew an easy table.

Seat 1. Eso Kral. Punter. Doesn't normally wear a shirt. New dad. Sleep deprived
Seat 2 Me. This is a stepping stone to the One Drop event at Vegas in the summer, where I will play disguised as Agent Sam Trickett
Seat 3 Nick Hicks. Seems nice. I have him as weak though. nice is weak. You need to be ruthless, like me crushing 5p-10p online and progressing to..5p-10p on another site
seat 6 Kinboshi. Nice. Nice is weak though. Thanks for the note from Q not to mention religion, speed cameras, homeopathy and Kenny Dalgliish
seat 8 Ben Vinson. Some random. Seems decent but not to my standard

Hand 1

I am in the small blind, my favourite position as they rarely see me coming to outplay them from there. My favourite is the smooth rim float jam that works so well on Friday nights against the Russians.

Nick Hicks raises to 1000 UTG at 200-400

Perfect. Phase one of my deception plan successful. I can now outplay him down the streets

I call. Again, I am nonchalant and flip the chips in like Le Cidre in Casino Royale. I still need to perfect the tears of blood as a reverse tell when I have the nuts though. No mpoint wasting it on these players though. Save it for Danny and Hellmuth in the summer when I amcrushing them.

the flop comes as I expected

10h

I check for deception with the aim to float with flair, dexterity and not a little technique

He c-bets 1,100

Perfect, that phase 3 complete

I call, as to plan

As long as it doesn't come the , as I have him on 2-2.I will float

turn .

Oh, Agent P leno never told me about this spot. I have 100,000 hands on eactly this flop against exactly this type of player and its never come the

I check, exuding strength hiding my inner confusion

He bets 3,600

I look at him, searching for breathing tells as taught to me in basic training by Agent P leno. He doesn't appear to be breathing.

I decide to fold, confident nonetheless that I could float and outplay him on the river if I wanted to


Hand 2

seat 9 raises to 800 on my big blind

I flick through my mental Heada Up display for the page in my manual that prepares me for this

Eso Kral 2050 on the button

I have Q-Q but confident I am up against Aces from the way his chips went into the pot I fold.

The initial raiser calls and check folds on   

I knew I was right to fold!


Hand 3.

Now I am on the button. This is my domain, no one will mess with my button. I am he-john, master of the Black clan, Agent of doom

Will Webster raises to 1,100 UTG

On the button I decide to fold a two way combination post flop monster against this player, to lull him into a false sense of security


Agent Black. Out.

!

And THAT is the Post of the Year, Rich.

[jgcblack]

Tighty is a Legend, fact. Just a shame I couldn't give more to the 'Tighty Monte' fund.

Yesterday, Today... Whatever it is was a great day for poker, for me.


Played fine in the DS I think, relatively tough table... Don't think. I did much / anything wrong most of the day, made a small hero call with A6 on 1096510 when I chkb flop and he lead/ bluffs...
The tentativity used to declare his hand at showdown proved I was right - he was bluffing... But Q9 actually won. Fml.

Anyways, then lost every pot for a couple of hours, raise/ folded a lot to tight players pulling out the 3 balls!
And finally bust reshipping with 19k @ 4/800/ 100 SB 66 vs MP KK, possibly a little big.. Unsure.

Went for a food break, Nandos alone then.....
Then played cash and just had amazing table after amazing table.... Poker 'friends', blonde-ites and other fun people everywhere...

Played decent in a tough lineup, but ultimately and like many... I lost too many pots to young Mr Langley and "his never ending string of fucking boats"



Made a few mistakes I think.. 


Not anything specific to report right now... Just Belton being a pussy.

Nn all, x

[TL900]

not even a #wpsir or #wpbelton? wtf is this let down?

[TL900]

And finally bust reshipping with 19k @ 4/800/ 100 SB 66 vs MP KK, possibly a little big.. Unsure.

Also, u said 20bb. This is a funny looking 20bb

[tight4better]

not even a #wpsir or #wpbelton? wtf is this let down?