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RED-DOG
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« Reply #285 on: April 24, 2019, 01:55:24 PM » |
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Mrs Red "Check out my new plug in orange juice sprayer". | Click to see full-size image. |
 Daughter "What a time to be alive" |
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Try to be the person your dog thinks you are.
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tikay
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« Reply #286 on: June 29, 2019, 06:34:24 PM » |
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| Click to see full-size image. |
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All details of the 2016 Vegas Staking Adventure can be found via this link - http://bit.ly/1pdQZDY (copyright Anthony James Kendall, 2016). |
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #287 on: July 03, 2019, 07:44:16 PM » |
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"Mr Djokoviv is challenging the call, the ball was called out".
Mrs Red: "If he's right does that man have to say sorry?"
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #288 on: August 26, 2019, 04:07:26 PM » |
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Mrs Red's insult, reserved for a special few. I've herd it loads of times over the years but today for some reason I actually listened to the words and they made me laugh.
"That stinking drawered bitch".
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Try to be the person your dog thinks you are.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #289 on: August 27, 2019, 12:54:51 PM » |
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Me: "I just took a photo of the fan and a shutter speed of 1/400 didn't freeze the movement, what does that prove?"""
Mrs Red: "Do I really need to answer?"
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Try to be the person your dog thinks you are.
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bobAlike
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« Reply #290 on: November 19, 2019, 09:23:18 PM » |
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Reds post on the TTPYO thread got me remembering that on a visit to the cinema my then 4 year old son asked for some cock porn from the young blushing lady who served us.
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Ah! The element of surprise
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nirvana
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« Reply #291 on: November 19, 2019, 09:49:09 PM » |
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Me: "I just took a photo of the fan and a shutter speed of 1/400 didn't freeze the movement, what does that prove?"""
Mrs Red: "Do I really need to answer?"
Haha, that's just a perfect answer |
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sola virtus nobilitat
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #292 on: February 03, 2020, 11:27:03 AM » |
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Me: Shows Mrs Red some dramatic footage of yesterday's terrorist attack, filmed by some bloke from a second floor bedroom.
Mrs Red" OMG! Look at the state if his window sill.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #293 on: March 05, 2020, 12:03:04 PM » |
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Me: (rummaging through my underwear drawer) "I can't decide which of these underpants turn you on the most".
Mrs Red: "I like the ones without the skid-marks".
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Try to be the person your dog thinks you are.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #294 on: May 30, 2020, 01:46:46 PM » |
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Mrs Red lectures me about leaving the sink and nail brush dirty as she wipes it down.
"All you have to do is rub your wet hands over the sink and rinse the nail brush under the tap"
Me: "You know your problem don't you?"
Mrs R: No.
Me: You haven't got a wife.
I think I'm in the doghouse.
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« Last Edit: May 30, 2020, 01:48:26 PM by RED-DOG »
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #295 on: September 11, 2020, 09:51:31 AM » |
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According to Mrs Red, when I have a wash I splash about like one of them waterhogs.
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Try to be the person your dog thinks you are.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #296 on: September 04, 2021, 07:32:57 PM » |
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We're just back from a week away in the camper.
One evening we parked up in a secluded spot down a quiet, one car an hour type country lane.
We read for an hour or so, watched a DVD, had a wash, ate our dinner and then got ready for bed.
Unnoticed by me, Mrs Red rinsed out her smalls and hung them out of sight of the road on the wing mirror nearest the hedge.
Later that night the van was rocked quite violently by a sudden gust of wind.
Imagine my confusion when Mrs Red piped up,
"Woah! What if my drawers blow off and cause an accident."
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Try to be the person your dog thinks you are.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #297 on: September 13, 2021, 11:05:09 AM » |
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Mrs Red picked some small, dry, wizened blackberries and then found another bush with large succulent ones.
We still have to eat the small dry ones though, because she doesn't wand them to die in vain.
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Doobs
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« Reply #298 on: February 25, 2022, 09:38:27 AM » |
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I have devoped a habit over the years of just saying the letter "F" rather than swearing. The other day when confronted by some appaling driving I went "JFC". My eldest pipes up, what does JFC mean? So I said well the first word is Jesus, you can guess the rest.
She replies "Jesus Fucking *****?"
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Most of the bets placed so far seem more like hopeful punts rather than value spots
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #299 on: February 25, 2022, 11:07:30 AM » |
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I have devoped a habit over the years of just saying the letter "F" rather than swearing. The other day when confronted by some appaling driving I went "JFC". My eldest pipes up, what does JFC mean? So I said well the first word is Jesus, you can guess the rest.
She replies "Jesus Fucking *****?"
Oh dear... Lol. |
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