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Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Topic: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary (Read 3604661 times)
RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
«
Reply #24495 on:
May 22, 2014, 01:04:40 PM »
Quote from: tikay on May 22, 2014, 10:22:43 AM
No idea how, but I somehow chanced upon this thread Tom.....
http://blondepoker.com/forum/index.php?topic=4133.0
If you have 20 minutes to spare, well worth a read.
Most of the stuff is from 2005.
There are several posts I wouldn't mind deleting now, but hey, it is what it is.
I did like this line though.
Please bear with me, Im no Rob Yong. His thoughts seem to just ooze out across the page like red wine spilled on a white tablecloth, unmistakeable, stark and vivid. Mine are more like gravy stains on your tie, smaller and harder to see.
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Reply #24496 on:
May 22, 2014, 01:24:19 PM »
Lakin' aht.
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Reply #24497 on:
May 22, 2014, 01:26:23 PM »
A bit random I know, but every few months I become obsessed with this song again.
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celtic
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Reply #24498 on:
May 23, 2014, 01:49:28 AM »
Just been reading that thread, and noticed the thing you said about how many children you have.
As you know (I think) I'm about to become a father again. It seems that almost everyday, I come across someone who asks me if its my first child. And I find myself having to explain it's not. I used to just go with, no, it's my second child, but that then lead on to, oh, how old? are they excited?, what sex? etc, which meant I then had to explain about holly. So now, I just go straight to the it's my second child, but my daughter died etc.
I hate talking about holly, particularly to people I don't really know that well, it feels kinda awkward, and I very rarely talk about her to people I know well. I don't know why that is. An awkwardness that I can't explain. Do you find this? Do you still feel a bit awkward when people ask how many children you have?
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Reply #24499 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:08:26 AM »
Quote from: celtic on May 23, 2014, 01:49:28 AM
Just been reading that thread, and noticed the thing you said about how many children you have.
As you know (I think) I'm about to become a father again. It seems that almost everyday, I come across someone who asks me if its my first child. And I find myself having to explain it's not. I used to just go with, no, it's my second child, but that then lead on to, oh, how old? are they excited?, what sex? etc, which meant I then had to explain about holly. So now, I just go straight to the it's my second child, but my daughter died etc.
I hate talking about holly, particularly to people I don't really know that well, it feels kinda awkward, and I very rarely talk about her to people I know well. I don't know why that is. An awkwardness that I can't explain. Do you find this? Do you still feel a bit awkward when people ask how many children you have?
Yours
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Yes. I do feel awkward when people ask how many children I have, not be cause I don't want to talk about Tommy, but because I don't want to burden someone who is just making polite conversation with such a heavy, emotionally charged answer. It makes them feel uncomfortable.
These days I take it on a case by case basis. If it's casual conversation with a stranger making small talk I'll probably just say that I have four girls and whisper an apology to Tommy under my breath, if it's a slightly deeper conversation or the person is more than a casual acquaintance I'll mention Tommy and then decide on the amount of detail I add depending on their reaction. It's surprising how often they go on to reveal some tragic event from their own lives.
I think their is a kind of comfort and solidarity in sharing something like this with someone who really knows what it's like. In the early days I used to actively seek out other parents who had lost a child. I think it was just to reassure myself that we were not the only ones and that life could go on after such a tragedy.
What I have learned is there is no right or wrong way to deal with it. Just do what works for you.
I know that I will never get over the loss of my son and I wouldn't want to. Grief is the price we pay for loving. I just try to live my life that little bit better, to make up for the one that he never had.
«
Last Edit: May 23, 2014, 09:38:50 AM by RED-DOG
»
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edgascoigne
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
«
Reply #24500 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:21:11 AM »
You're amazing, Tom.
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
«
Reply #24501 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:33:17 AM »
Vinny is crap as a poker secretary BTW.
He's OK at letting me know what's on and where, but he looks dreadful in a little black dress.
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Steve Swift
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
«
Reply #24502 on:
May 23, 2014, 09:26:47 AM »
Quote from: edgascoigne on May 23, 2014, 08:21:11 AM
You're amazing, Tom.
TY Edd, i wanted to post and kind of didn't, but you helped by summing up my feelings. +1 obv
Steve
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Reply #24503 on:
May 23, 2014, 10:28:56 AM »
This is a great piece.
I love photography.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-27516384
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
«
Reply #24504 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:46:14 PM »
If you were to order scampi & chips, how many of each would you expect to get?
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Reply #24505 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:47:33 PM »
I can see you viewing Zelly. Are you home?
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Redsgirl
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Reply #24506 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:55:00 PM »
Sorry had a load of pages to catch up on, you'd gone by the time I got here.
Yes I'm home, whats happening with you?
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pokerfan
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
«
Reply #24507 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:55:21 PM »
Quote from: RED-DOG on May 23, 2014, 08:46:14 PM
If you were to order scampi & chips, how many of each would you expect to get?
12/2 decent shovels.
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
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Reply #24508 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:58:26 PM »
Quote from: Redsgirl on May 23, 2014, 08:55:00 PM
Sorry had a load of pages to catch up on, you'd gone by the time I got here.
Yes I'm home, whats happening with you?
In a break. Have < average chips but still within my comfort zone.
Is everyone OK, and do you like my step?
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RED-DOG
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Re: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary
«
Reply #24509 on:
May 23, 2014, 08:59:09 PM »
Quote from: pokerfan on May 23, 2014, 08:55:21 PM
Quote from: RED-DOG on May 23, 2014, 08:46:14 PM
If you were to order scampi & chips, how many of each would you expect to get?
12/2 decent shovels.
Guess how many I got?
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