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Author Topic: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary  (Read 3587412 times)
RED-DOG
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« Reply #30030 on: October 20, 2018, 05:02:59 PM »

Yes. Cartoons will have their own category.
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« Reply #30031 on: October 21, 2018, 04:19:50 AM »

Nice.

When I see stuff like that i always want to know it's history. How/why did it get here, who brought it?

Almost forgot I posted this. If I am back down there and it's still there I will ask about. I suspect it will be, I think it's parked there to be shown off, doesn't look like a work horse does it.

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« Reply #30032 on: October 21, 2018, 12:34:45 PM »

Why the fek can't they make the slots in a toaster 1/4" longer and 1/4" deeper?

Surely the additional production costs would be negligible.

Have you ever tried to squeeze a slice of bread shorter? yes it goes shorter, but then it kinks in the middle causing one part to be closer to the heat and another part further away resulting in either a burnt strip or an untoasted strip.

When the slot isn't deep enough the top edge  of the bread pokes out, requiring me to turn it over half way through.

I can't believe that toaster manufacturers are unaware of these issues.

I'm beginning to suspect that Mrs Red's cheapskatery is contributing to the problem. I try to persuade her that going for low-cost over quality is sometimes a false economy but don't think I'm getting through, she says things like, "It's just a box with hot wires in, how can one be better than the other"?

I've tried to compromise by suggesting that she finds the dearest one and the cheapest one and then buys one from the mid-range, but she interprets that as 'find the three cheapest ones (Most likely all under a fiver) and buy the middle one of those'.

The only way to find out if expensive toasters have more generous slots than cheap ones is by doing some research myself. I'm just a bit worried about wandering around Currys electrical department with a slice of seeded wholemeal.  
« Last Edit: October 21, 2018, 12:37:36 PM by RED-DOG » Logged

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tikay
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« Reply #30033 on: October 21, 2018, 12:51:14 PM »

Why the fek can't they make the slots in a toaster 1/4" longer and 1/4" deeper?

Surely the additional production costs would be negligible.

Have you ever tried to squeeze a slice of bread shorter? yes it goes shorter, but then it kinks in the middle causing one part to be closer to the heat and another part further away resulting in either a burnt strip or an untoasted strip.

When the slot isn't deep enough the top edge  of the bread pokes out, requiring me to turn it over half way through.

I can't believe that toaster manufacturers are unaware of these issues.

I'm beginning to suspect that Mrs Red's cheapskatery is contributing to the problem. I try to persuade her that going for low-cost over quality is sometimes a false economy but don't think I'm getting through, she says things like, "It's just a box with hot wires in, how can one be better than the other"?

I've tried to compromise by suggesting that she finds the dearest one and the cheapest one and then buys one from the mid-range, but she interprets that as 'find the three cheapest ones (Most likely all under a fiver) and buy the middle one of those'.

The only way to find out if expensive toasters have more generous slots than cheap ones is by doing some research myself. I'm just a bit worried about wandering around Currys electrical department with a slice of seeded wholemeal.  


Gill is the same, always buys a cheapo toaster without regard to bread size. Drives me nuts.

Think the answer though is that toasters are a global product, not made specifically for the UK market as such, & here in the UK we traditionally have "bigger" bread than elsewhere.
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« Reply #30034 on: October 21, 2018, 01:06:18 PM »

I've suggested we invest in one of these, it looks like the BMW 5 series of the toaster world to me. An absolute snip at £115.99.


Perfect for Artisan breads and lovers of home made dough, the Dualit 2-Slot Long Lite Toaster has been designed with extra long slots to accommodate different varieties of bread - such as sourdough and oversized slices - and still ensure maximum browning coverage.

This toaster also features Perfect Toast Technology, which is designed to produce slice after slice of consistently perfect toast. The patented Peek & Pop function allows you to check the toast without cancelling the timing cycle, giving greater browning control.

The Long Slot Lite Toaster comes with a warming rack that can be used to gently heat croissants, buns, naan and pitta breads and also features a Bagel function, where one side is toasted while warming the other.

As well as having extra-long slots, the Toaster benefits from extra-wide 36mm slots allowing for larger items such as English Muffins to be toasted and a Defrost cycle for frozen breads.

The 2-slot Long Lite Toaster comes with a stylish gloss black finish and also offers an automatic pop-up function.






 Click to see full-size image.












According to Mrs Red I'm an idiot and I will soon soon stop worrying about toaster slots when she kicks me in the bollocks.


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tikay
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« Reply #30035 on: October 21, 2018, 01:12:54 PM »


Gotta love Corporate blurb;


Perfect Toast Technology
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« Reply #30036 on: October 21, 2018, 01:53:57 PM »

We used to use one of these. It would take any length or thickness of slice and your toast was always perfectly browned.


 Click to see full-size image.
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« Reply #30037 on: October 21, 2018, 02:05:00 PM »


Perfect Toast Technology.....
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« Reply #30038 on: October 21, 2018, 02:23:14 PM »

While I'm on the subject, we buy Lurpak butter but we have the 'spreadable' version.

What in the name of God do they add to it to make it spreadable? It must me the most frictionless substance in the world. When you get some on your knife it shoots right off before you can transfer it to your toast. It usually lands on the kitchen top but it doesn't stop there, it slides off the edge and down the cabinets. It even continues to slide for a few feet once it reaches the floor.


If you do manage to eat some, I'm surprised it doesn't immediately slip through your alimentary canal, shoot out of your arse, slide down your leg and end up in your shoe.

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« Reply #30039 on: October 21, 2018, 02:30:34 PM »

On the upside, there's probably not much chance of it clogging my arteries.
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« Reply #30040 on: October 21, 2018, 02:40:40 PM »

Where's science wife when I need her?


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« Reply #30041 on: October 21, 2018, 02:49:34 PM »

Also.....

We use Canderel sweetners because (imo at least) they leave no after-taste.

I have three problems with them though.

1- They are extortionately expensive. (To combat this we buy them loose and put them into the dispensers ourselves)

2- The dispensers wear out after a few refills.

3- Sometimes we get a 'dud' batch that aren't regulation sweetness, then I have to work out my dose all over again, raising my dosage to 4 tablets, or reducing it to 2.

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Jon MW
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« Reply #30042 on: October 21, 2018, 03:52:06 PM »

While I'm on the subject, we buy Lurpak butter but we have the 'spreadable' version.

What in the name of God do they add to it to make it spreadable? It must me the most frictionless substance in the world. When you get some on your knife it shoots right off before you can transfer it to your toast. It usually lands on the kitchen top but it doesn't stop there, it slides off the edge and down the cabinets. It even continues to slide for a few feet once it reaches the floor.


If you do manage to eat some, I'm surprised it doesn't immediately slip through your alimentary canal, shoot out of your arse, slide down your leg and end up in your shoe.



Lol I don't think there's too much science involved - don't they just add oil to make it spreadable?
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« Reply #30043 on: October 21, 2018, 04:38:19 PM »

While I'm on the subject, we buy Lurpak butter but we have the 'spreadable' version.

What in the name of God do they add to it to make it spreadable? It must me the most frictionless substance in the world. When you get some on your knife it shoots right off before you can transfer it to your toast. It usually lands on the kitchen top but it doesn't stop there, it slides off the edge and down the cabinets. It even continues to slide for a few feet once it reaches the floor.


If you do manage to eat some, I'm surprised it doesn't immediately slip through your alimentary canal, shoot out of your arse, slide down your leg and end up in your shoe.



Lol I don't think there's too much science involved - don't they just add oil to make it spreadable?


Oh this is much more slippery than oil. I'm guessing it has a skid-point coefficient of 0.061 recurring. It makes black ice seem positively sticky. 
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« Reply #30044 on: October 21, 2018, 05:33:08 PM »

That spreadable Lurpak tastes more like margerine than butter to me - I can't eat it.

I do have sensitive tastebuds and hate margerine which led to me once winning £5 for telling Stork from butter at The Food Fair held at Olympia.*

A fiver was a lot of money in those days I'll have you know.


*I may have mentioned that previously.
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