Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary

[RED-DOG]

Now you've had a bang driving a car,

I bet that was a thrilling 45 seconds.

[gatso]

Yesterday, I took some ladies to dinner....

Look at their beautiful hair.



Thank you.

Here they are with the horses.

Tom, what's the reason for the one line of barbed wire across your gate, not even at the top?

[RED-DOG]

Yesterday, I took some ladies to dinner....

Look at their beautiful hair.



Thank you.

Here they are with the horses.

Tom, what's the reason for the one line of barbed wire across your gate, not even at the top?

That's very observant of you, and a great question.


It's there because otherwise, the horses would use the gate to scratch their arses on.

The gate us usually the weakest part of the fence and the scratching motion can often break the gate, flip the latch, or lift the whole thing off it's hinges.

If the wire was at the top it wouldn't prevent the horses from scratching, but it would prevent me from leaning on it.

[RED-DOG]

Thanks Ralph.

Kizzy impatiently posed for these pictures before hurrying off to her favourite shady spot to address the complexities of this unusually shaped but strangely fascinating bone.

[Karabiner]

I reckon it's a sort of rubik's cube of a bone in terms of how to tackle it.

Hopefully it will distract her so that she doesn't look in any mirrors otherwise her hairdresser might be in trouble.

[RED-DOG]

I reckon it's a sort of rubik's cube of a bone in terms of how to tackle it.

Hopefully it will distract her so that she doesn't look in any mirrors otherwise her hairdresser might be in trouble.

It's OK, vanity isn't one of her failings. Greed on the other hand....

[RED-DOG]

Warning! This post contains explicit references to poker.


I suppose it's about time I gave you a brief update on how the poker is going "Who gives a shiny shite?" I hear you cry. Well just shut up and listen. The sooner we start, the sooner we'll be finished.

I'm just coming back to earth after one of those wonderful purple patches where I could do no wrong. I hit everything, called, bluffed or passed in all the right spots, and generally had a whale of a time, but more than this, I managed to swell my little bankroll enough to ensure the bills and my buy-ins are taken care of for the next few months.

Just as well really, because now the boot is on the other foot. Last week I couldn't hit a cow's arse with a banjo, every decision I made was wrong. I still had a lot of luck, but unfortunately, it was all bad.

So. I run good for a while, then it all goes tits up and I run bad for a while. Nothing new there of course, it's the same for everyone, but it does give me an opportunity to make a brief observation.

When you are running bad, take great care to play within your bankroll, it’s the only thing between you and skintville.  When you are running good, take even more care, because the times when you have a big wad on your hip are the times when you can do the most damage.

Now I know that some of you are rolling your eyes and thinking “FFS Red, not the old bankroll chestnut again” but please, just indulge me for a few moments.

I’m nothing special as a poker player, but in spite of that, I have survived for quite a long time without borrowing and without going back to work. It isn’t always easy, but somehow I keep managing to pay the bills and the buy-ins.

So what lessons have I learned in my years as a “Professional player” <Blush> what secrets, what gems of knowledge can I impart?

Well I’m not saying I’ve cracked it yet, but I have made an astonishing discovery.

You know those first few words of advice that people give you when you’re just starting out? The boring ones about patience, game selection, bankroll management etc? Well those old clichéd lines that you have heard so often that they have long since ceased to even register, those simple, basic lessons that are doled out like a mantra at the beginning of every novice level poker book…. They are the secret.

The fact that the words are old and worn and familiar doesn’t mean they are not true. They didn’t become clichés for nothing.

Finding out what you need to do to become a winning player is ridiculously easy.

Actually doing it?…… Now that’s the hard part

[RED-DOG]

Last Sunday, along with Ralph "Peter Pan of poker" Shalson and Tony "Coffin Dodger" Kendall, I went to Stoke Circus to play the £2k added, £100 freezeout.

I haven't been to Stoke Circus before, but I shall definitely be going again. It's a nice plush modern casino with a nice spacious cardroom at one end a restaurant and bar at the other.

Two things impressed me as soon as I walked through the door. One was the loud music, or, more accurately, the lack of it, and the other was the smell, roast beef and potatoes with Bisto gravy unless I was very much mistaken.

The comp itself boasted as good a structure as you will ever find for a one day comp, and that, along with a couple of grand added to the prize poo,l attracted a field of 158 runners. Well done to them I say.

Fields as big as these are becoming a very rare sight these days, It was wonderful, just like the old festival atmosphere of 2 or 3 years ago. Unfortunately the behaviour of a minority of the players was no better than it was 2 or 3 years ago, they still pass out of turn, show their cards to other players before mucking, and discuss the hand while there is still action. When you complain, the dealers still shrug their shoulders and say "What can we do?"

I had one of those "Can't get going" nights, but I managed to hang on until there were about 65 or so players left. By that time I was in push all in to any unopened pot mode. I picked up the plants a couple of times, but then Tony was moved to my table. He knew exactly what I was doing, his stack was similar to mine and he was doing the same thing.

Tony was sitting two to my right, so he always got to act before me, he pushed and picked up the blinds twice in succession. Then I picked up KJ and I moved all in, THEN I saw that Tony's chips were already over the line, he had pushed again and I hadn't noticed.

Tony had AJ. His hand held, I went busto and doubled him up in the process. Fat lot of good it did him, apparently he donked em off shortly after.

All in all I had a great might at Stoke Circus. Once a month they run the same comp, with the same structure and same delicious buffet. and they add £1000.

As Arnie says, "Save me some roast taters, I'll be back"

[MANTIS01]

Posted by: RED-DOG

Unfortunately the behaviour of a minority of the players was no better than it was 2 or 3 years ago, they still pass out of turn, show their cards to other players before mucking, and discuss the hand while there is still action.

Then I picked up KJ and I moved all in, THEN I saw that Tony's chips were already over the line, he had pushed again and I hadn't noticed.

Yep, those ignorant players that act out of turn really get on your tits don't they?

The purple patch theory is something that is a phenomenon imo and interests me greatly. The maths always stays the same whatever the day so why does it happen? It's funny though because people tend to up the stakes and play bigger when they are in the midst of bad patch and are chasing it rather than when they are flying. I think it is a good idea to have an emergency fund stashed under the bed. Then when you are in the midst of a purple patch just dive into the biggest event you can find to really put the theory to the test. If nothing else the confidence that comes from feeling invincible will help you to play optimally.

[Kev B]

Nice write up Tom, and spot on all round. The card showing is most probably the local element. It has been complained about before but is hard to eliminate unless more stingent penalties are put on the offending players. Wether this will happen given the lessening numbers attending at the moment is unlikely as it's the regulars who are the persistent offenders. It is however one of the best provincial card rooms in the country IMO.

Anyway look forward to see you and your appetite next month. 

[MANTIS01]

Posted by: Kev B

It has been complained about before but is hard to eliminate unless more stingent penalties are put on the offending players.

The answer is to employ dealers who have a personality and have some degree of people skill. A poor dealer who cannot control the game he/she is dealing is the catalyst for problems. Those than mutter that there is nothing they can do lack the basic skills to keep players in line and the enlightement to appreciate there is much they can do. Absolutely no need to dole out harsh penalties and be 'strict' with people, just employ dealers who can talk to people.

[TightEnd]

but, in some dealer training schools, they are encouraged specifally not to engage with the players....

[ShatnerPants]

Posted by: Kev B

It has been complained about before but is hard to eliminate unless more stingent penalties are put on the offending players.

The answer is to employ dealers who have a personality and have some degree of people skill. A poor dealer who cannot control the game he/she is dealing is the catalyst for problems. Those than mutter that there is nothing they can do lack the basic skills to keep players in line and the enlightement to appreciate there is much they can do. Absolutely no need to dole out harsh penalties and be 'strict' with people, just employ dealers who can talk to people.

I've not played much live, but I have dabbled at roulette a few times.

Some croupiers slink behind the table and don't say a word to the punters, just whisper last bets etc as necessary.

Others march up to the table and introduce themselves, maybe making a comment ( with a smile ) to a regular about his habit of making late bets.

Guess who controlled the table best, and got better tips as well.

As long as there is a threat of punishment over bad practice, a well worded and well timed warning will normally settle things nicely.

[ShatnerPants]

but, in some dealer training schools, they are encouraged specifally not to engage with the players....

That's just daft.  Anyone dealing with the public in any position should be trained how to handle them.  Not to do so is to invite abuse and mistreatment.

[MANTIS01]

but, in some dealer training schools, they are encouraged specifally not to engage with the players....

And therein lies the problem. Medieval rules like that are ridic. Effective communication is all that is needed in a customer service environment. No talking and strict punishments are not necessary. Now tipping is in place for dealers I think talking to those tipping you is pretty damn mandatory. No reasonable person is going to like to think they are responsible for spoiling everyone else's game. So if you tell them with tact and personality they just wont do it anymore. Players will always try and control dealers with small personalities, it's like a sport for some people.