You failed to give any credit to the run good pie. Nice bink though mate!
Haha! As unbelievable as this sounds (though don't expect you to believe anything written in "the diary"

) I was just heating up some christmas pudding and remembered the apple pie bet, so I raced back to my laptop to give you some credit.
Basically, after I'd folded for the first 3 levels, I realised that I didn't have dessert after my pre-tournament soup. I needed an apple pie and damned if I was going to pay for it, especially given that I'm fairly certain I got caught "speeding" by a couple of roadside "police officers." I don't think I was doing much over 30, just the careless 34mph you end up doing on roads that are wider than a football field but for some unbeknown reason still have a speed limit. This isn't going to stop two failed humans, whose mothers clearly never loved them, and whose resultant anger and insecurity will be taken out on otherwise decent human beings such as myself by accepting paid employment as a professional fascist, from spending their Boxing Day lacking even the tiniest amount of discretion with a handheld speed camera and an incredibly condescending air of smug satisfaction knowing that they did right by the rules. I hope you die in hell, you odious subhumans, and please please please please PLEASE don't have children.
Armed with this (at the time repressed) ammunition, I set about finding someone I knew and wagering dessert on something. So I sent the poor, unsuspecting, Bieber-clone PeeJay a text that simply read "piiiiiiie." I could see the look of utter puzzlement on his face. He came over and freely admitted, "I don't get your sense of humour..." We decided that the chip leader by the first break would get the pies in, at the time I definitely had edge, but I think PeeJay really wanted some pie... Almost immediately after that conversation, this hand took place:
One limper to me in the cutoff at the 75/150, I make it 575 with

, the big blind and the limper call. Flop is

, checked to me, I lead for 900, and the limper checkraise shoves for about 6.5k. I call and he's almost dead with the

. He goes, "oops, thought you'd fold to that checkraise. Oh well, I hope you enjoy your pie." What a legend. I got up to go and tell PeeJay that I just made a 20k stack, and he was all-in with two outs. Half of me wanted to call in the jackball, but the other half of me was really quite hungry. Weeeee pie. And custard. And a text saying "this is run good pie so now you won't do your bollocks. Bliss.