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Author Topic: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary  (Read 3586876 times)
RED-DOG
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« Reply #31830 on: November 03, 2019, 05:34:04 PM »

Speaking of wordsmiths, I'm going to miss old Bercow as speaker. He used to come out with some corkers.

I was looking for a pic of him and stumbled upon one if him and his wife.

Is she particularly tall or is he a bit vertically challenged?



 Click to see full-size image.


The latter Tom, he is famously short. Think Celtic, plus a bit.


Blimey!

I'm scared of Mrs Red as it is, if she was that much taller than me I'd be frit to death.
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« Reply #31831 on: November 03, 2019, 05:49:23 PM »

Reminds me of one of the old circuit players. He pronounced his name 'Ronnie de Bollocks' but I've no idea how he spelled it.

He always had a some or other leggy blonde towering over him.

Tony will know his proper name. I think they went to Russia together and got arrested.

Ronnie De Beau Lox.

I saw him very recently actually, at SPT Brighton. He was originally called Ronnie something else but had his name changed by deed poll. He looks very unkempt these days, with long straggly hair, but he's fine.

And yes, we did all get apprehended at Moscow Airport. Ronnie, Ed Giddens, me, & the chap who used to run Celebrity Poker, his name evades me at the mo. Cost us (collectively) about $30,000 as I recall. Ronnie & the guy from Celeb Poker had won the event & picked up $100,000 (it was a Team Event) & we had agreed to chop up any winnings between the 4 of us, plus there were various swaps. Think I ended up with $10k or similar. Sadly, some hanky panky went off, & Security were waiting for us at Moscow airport. Even sadder, one of our party had concealed his money inside his socks & pants, & it all came out on top. Immigration took us all in the Naughty Room but before they could ask me to declare any money, I plonked it all on the table as I was crapping myself. It was a Saturday & we had all been warned that we'd be thrown in a cell until the Monday then appear in Court & maybe face 10 years in Siberia. 

Then I did some work for a TV Production company who planned to make a TV Show out of the Moscow event. I had to fly to Hungary or somesuch & stay in a posh hotel, all exs paid, plus €700 a day in fees for my work. I was out there a week or so, so with a week in a posh hotel, flights there & back plus 7 days fees that was a good few bob.  I sent the bill about a month later, & was startled to get a reply from his wife, which was along the lines of.....

"Dear Mr Kendall,

I regret to inform you that my husband was killed in a 'plane crash 2 weeks ago"


I googled it, & it was true. A light 'plane crash in Northampton, & the fella was killed.

Had to write that bill off. Could hardly sue the wife, all things considered.

Jeez, I dread to think how much money has slipped through my fingers one way & another.

Cut me some slack if my memory has smudged the details, but this is all true.

You may wonder how this is all so fresh in my mind, but that's a long story for which you can blame Chompy who made a proposal of sorts to me last week...


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« Reply #31832 on: November 03, 2019, 05:53:47 PM »


Oh yeah. I ended up with $7,000 after I'd paid the "fine" to Moscow immigration.

However, we all had "swaps" & the guys who won all the money had the lot confiscated. So I felt honour-bound to give back my share of the swaps.

That all went well then.
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« Reply #31833 on: November 03, 2019, 05:54:59 PM »



You may wonder how this is all so fresh in my mind, but that's a long story for which you can blame Chompy who made a proposal of sorts to me last week...




No surprise here.

I knew all that flouncing would come to no good.
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« Reply #31834 on: November 03, 2019, 05:57:03 PM »


Oh yeah. I ended up with $7,000 after I'd paid the "fine" to Moscow immigration.

However, we all had "swaps" & the guys who won all the money had the lot confiscated. So I felt honour-bound to give back my share of the swaps.

That all went well then.


Never mind Tone, you can't buy memories.
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« Reply #31835 on: November 04, 2019, 12:44:59 AM »


It’s painful mind, but nowhere near as painful as a dislocated replacement hip joint.

Good opener for a pain I've experienced top 10, least to most:

PF
infected corneal abrasion
drain pipes being removed post heart surgery
properly stubbed toe
tooth abscess


Pain wise, I've been quite lucky to date, but would agree with the ranking of the two I've experienced on that list.

I think I was about 12 or 13 when I did the stubbed toe one.  We were playing football in the snow in the local youth club playground on the street where we grew up.  Unfortunately, this made it impossible to locate the small concrete ridge (maybe about 2 inches high) which divided the tarmac area and the grassy part of the playground.  I managed to discover it when I went for a delicate chip into the top corner of the 'goal' (two trees of about the right width, with the top of the playground wall representing the height of the imaginary crossbar).  My big toe found the concrete ridge at an impressive pace as it attempted to get underneath the ball, and I experienced the worst pain I've felt in my life.  Weirdly, the over-riding memory of it was that it made me feel physically sick, as if throwing up was somehow the way to alleviate it.  I think I retched a few times, nothing more, but it was a very odd sensation that I can recall far more clearly than the actual pain in my toe, so maybe this was the body's way of creating some kind of mental diversion.

I was pretty certain that I'd broken my toe, but having gone crying into the house, my Dad relied on his colliery first aid course and sight of similar injuries seen from fellow miners at the pit, to diagnose that I'd just kicked the toe into my foot.  Consequently, instead of a trip to A&E, he performed the treatment himself of simply pulling the dislocated toe back out and into place (a treatment which, at the time, I would have easily ranked as the 2nd worst pain I've felt in my life).

The toe swelled up pretty impressively over the next few days, and it took a while before I was able to put on a normal shoe again.  It also went through a cycle of weird and interesting bruise colours.  I'm not sure exactly what damage I did to it beyond that but my right big toe is now noticeably shorter than its equivalent on the other foot, and a little bit more crooked.

It's nothing compared to some of the subsequent experiences posted, but reading Longines' post brought back the memories of it for the first time in a few years.
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"...And If You Flash Him A Smile He'll Take Your Teeth As Deposit..."
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« Reply #31836 on: November 04, 2019, 07:06:18 AM »

You struggle to beat toothache - I had all my top teeth out aged 20 bar the big back 2
Been slowly losing the bottom set ,3 remain ,one very loose ,so I’ve got a good idea
My dad aged 85 has all his teeth bar 1 he recently had removed
But ear ache beats childbirth im fairly sure
Go on holiday swimming without ear plugs 🔌,nearly typed rear plugs lol
After a day or two the pain is quite excruciating
So whenever we go away it’s ear drops n ear plugs in the case
Many a family holiday spent in the  ER
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« Reply #31837 on: November 04, 2019, 11:52:26 AM »

I Thomas McCready, will lose 7lb by next Monday. (or the Monday after)

Swelp me God.



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« Reply #31838 on: November 04, 2019, 12:14:19 PM »

Looks like Mothercare is going tits up. (Pun intended)


https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-50287153
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« Reply #31839 on: November 04, 2019, 12:17:11 PM »

He gets paid 12 million a year FFS! Why didn't he sack her and then date her?




McDonald's boss Steve Easterbrook fired after dating employee.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-50283720



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« Reply #31840 on: November 04, 2019, 12:46:52 PM »

Sweeee...t


I like Jakemans cough sweets.

I don't carry them with me but I do keep a few in strategic places. Behind the settee/in my man-bag/car door pocket etc.

I'm a sweet cruncher by nature but I've trained myself not to crunch the Jakemans. (spoils the effect and the experience)

The trouble is, now that the temperature is dropping the ones in the car door pocket get really cold overnight and when I pop one into my mouth the sudden warmth causes it to shatter or at least split in two, which leads to involuntarily crunching.

Solutions please.






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« Reply #31841 on: November 04, 2019, 12:49:48 PM »

I was astonished to find out what this is for.



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« Reply #31842 on: November 04, 2019, 12:52:13 PM »

And I still can't work out what this is for. (Both belong to Mrs Red BTW)




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« Reply #31843 on: November 04, 2019, 12:56:54 PM »

Isnt it a scent bottle?
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« Reply #31844 on: November 04, 2019, 01:00:10 PM »

And I still can't work out what this is for. (Both belong to Mrs Red BTW)




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Is it what Papillon described as a "charger"?
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All details of the 2016 Vegas Staking Adventure can be found via this link - http://bit.ly/1pdQZDY (copyright Anthony James Kendall, 2016).
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