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Author Topic: Joke!!  (Read 310259 times)
POWWWWWWWW
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« Reply #1170 on: February 13, 2017, 11:38:34 PM »

People are always making fun of my car because it's ugly and green.

At least I avacado.
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verndog158
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« Reply #1171 on: February 17, 2017, 11:21:02 AM »

People are always making fun of my car because it's ugly and green.

At least I avacado.

Lollipop ladies, jeez they make me cross
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ignore verndog he's a fool

'he had a deep run in EPT Barnsley'
MANTIS01
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« Reply #1172 on: March 29, 2017, 10:55:03 PM »

Phoned down to the hotel receptionist and asked if the porn channel was disabled. She said "no is normal people you weirdo".
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Tikay - "He has a proven track record in business, he is articulate, intelligent, & presents his cases well"

Claw75 - "Mantis is not only a blonde legend he's also very easy on the eye"

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DMorgan
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« Reply #1173 on: March 29, 2017, 11:36:13 PM »

Phoned down to the hotel receptionist and asked if the porn channel was disabled. She said "no is normal people you weirdo".

 
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MANTIS01
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« Reply #1174 on: May 07, 2017, 09:41:11 PM »

My pet mouse Elvis died today. He was caught in a trap.
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Tikay - "He has a proven track record in business, he is articulate, intelligent, & presents his cases well"

Claw75 - "Mantis is not only a blonde legend he's also very easy on the eye"

Outragous76 - "a really nice certainly intelligent guy"

taximan007 & Girgy85 & Celtic & Laxie - <3 Mantis
MANTIS01
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« Reply #1175 on: May 08, 2017, 11:19:22 PM »

RIP boiling water. You will be mist.
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Tikay - "He has a proven track record in business, he is articulate, intelligent, & presents his cases well"

Claw75 - "Mantis is not only a blonde legend he's also very easy on the eye"

Outragous76 - "a really nice certainly intelligent guy"

taximan007 & Girgy85 & Celtic & Laxie - <3 Mantis
booder
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« Reply #1176 on: June 23, 2017, 12:00:43 PM »

Have you been hit with a rhythm stick ?

You could be entitled to compensation with a personal Ian Dury claim.
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Quote from: action man
im not speculating, either, but id have been pretty peeved if i missed the thread and i ended up getting clipped, kindly accepting a lift home.

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
Martin Luther King Jr
RED-DOG
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« Reply #1177 on: June 23, 2017, 03:21:05 PM »

Have you been hit with a rhythm stick ?

You could be entitled to compensation with a personal Ian Dury claim.

Oh dear....
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The older I get, the better I was.
TightEnd
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« Reply #1178 on: July 28, 2017, 03:14:31 PM »

A Roman walks into a bar, orders a martinus

'You mean a martini?' asks barman

Roman replies 'If I wanted a double I would've asked for it..'
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My eyes are open wide
By the way,I made it through the day
I watch the world outside
By the way, I'm leaving out today
DMorgan
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« Reply #1179 on: August 08, 2017, 09:04:35 PM »

A Roman walks into a bar, orders a martinus

'You mean a martini?' asks barman

Roman replies 'If I wanted a double I would've asked for it..'

lol, took a minute though!
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booder
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« Reply #1180 on: August 16, 2017, 08:48:50 PM »

Ive decided to get rid of my old hoover
It was only gathering dust
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Quote from: action man
im not speculating, either, but id have been pretty peeved if i missed the thread and i ended up getting clipped, kindly accepting a lift home.

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
Martin Luther King Jr
bobAlike
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« Reply #1181 on: September 11, 2017, 10:16:14 PM »

My neighbour is in the Guinness Book Of Records for having the most concussions.
He lives very close to me - in fact a stone's throw away.
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Ah! The element of surprise
booder
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« Reply #1182 on: September 16, 2017, 12:24:04 PM »

Have YOU had to walk 500 miles?

Were you advised to walk 500 more?

You could be entitled to compensation.

Call the Pro Claimers now!
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Quote from: action man
im not speculating, either, but id have been pretty peeved if i missed the thread and i ended up getting clipped, kindly accepting a lift home.

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
Martin Luther King Jr
bobAlike
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« Reply #1183 on: September 23, 2017, 04:08:35 PM »

My lack of knowledge on Greek mythology has always been my Achilles Elbow..
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Ah! The element of surprise
bobAlike
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« Reply #1184 on: September 24, 2017, 10:16:36 AM »

I asked my Welsh friend how many sexual partners he'd had but before he could answer he fell asleep.
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Ah! The element of surprise
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