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Author Topic: Vagueness and the Aftermath - A sporadic diary  (Read 3587040 times)
Rod Paradise
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« Reply #30810 on: July 15, 2019, 07:26:55 PM »



So I'm undoubtedly a desk jockey, never been a practical type. My mechanical limits to date have been a few oil changes, the occasional disks and pads and once even managed a wishbone change.

Son announces that a garage has diagnosed a slight oil leak as a weeping oil filter housing gasket. Apparently there are loads of forum posts (of bollocks(c)) and YouTube videos and it's dead easy Dad. Just need to remove a couple of belts, loosen some pulleys, remove the alternator, remove the entire housing and bob's your uncle....

The confidence of youth eh? I wasn't quite so sure. I wander down at 09:30 and son already has the aux belt lying on the driveway. In for a penny and all that.

With the benefit of hindsight, if we knew what we were doing we could have been finished by 11:00. With the benefit of foresight I'd have gladly given him the £170 to get the garage to do it and buggered off back to the sofa.
 
Belts? easy.

Tensioners? simples once we'd got past the traditional trip to the motor factors to buy this weeks new tools: a T50 torx bit and a handy coshing weapon disguised as a 36mm socket.

Pulley removal? Pulley bolt length = 10cm. Distance between bolt and bodywork = 10.5cm. These paperthin sockets obviously haven't made it over from Germany yet. We improvise with our remaining knuckle skin.

Alternator removal? Remove two bolts and convince ourselves there must be a third because the bastard thing was not shifting. Persuasion with a crow bar eventually helped. This should have been a slight clue as to what was to come....

Getting the housing off was a piece of cake. Change the gasket and I'm thinking we can make the pub for lunch at this rate.

Fitting the alternator is the reversal of removal. Like bollocks it is. There is a BMW engine designer somewhere whose ears were on fire this weekend. Imagine trying to perfectly align two bolt holes, one attached to an engine block and one attached to a bulky alternator when the clearance between the four metal faces is measured in angstroms. And you can't see it. Once you've push the alternator into position you have zero chance to move it, all you can do is yank it out and try again.

Four chuffing hours.

Son wraps the belts back in place and starts it up. I'm half expecting four foot sparks and pistons exiting the garage at a rate of knots but to be fair to him, started first time and did not immediately implode.

Apparently next weekend's task is the clutch delay valve. Can't wait.


Please don't stop doing the DIY car repair projects, you describe them so accurately and passionately It's like I'm doing these things for the first time all over again, only this time I can laugh and enjoy it.

Every mechanic in the world has been there and suffered with you, and we all have the scars, both mental and physical, to prove it.

Kudos Mr Long & son, you not only walk the walk, you torx the torque.

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Longines
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« Reply #30811 on: July 16, 2019, 08:49:09 AM »

Kudos Mr Long & son, you not only walk the walk, you torx the torque.

Too good.

Don't tell my son but he's now in his early twenties and is 300 miles away at Uni for most of the year, to be able to bond over the Swarfega is part of life's journey that I'm really enjoying. A number of his cohort are driving round in 1 or 2 year old cars provided by the bank of Mum & Dad because old cars aren't safe and break down. Now we could probably afford to do the same but driving a snotter and having to fettle it to keep it on the road, that's a rite of passage that everyone should experience IMO. I believe they call it character building.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #30812 on: July 16, 2019, 05:02:25 PM »

Kudos Mr Long & son, you not only walk the walk, you torx the torque.

Too good.

Don't tell my son but he's now in his early twenties and is 300 miles away at Uni for most of the year, to be able to bond over the Swarfega is part of life's journey that I'm really enjoying. A number of his cohort are driving round in 1 or 2 year old cars provided by the bank of Mum & Dad because old cars aren't safe and break down. Now we could probably afford to do the same but driving a snotter and having to fettle it to keep it on the road, that's a rite of passage that everyone should experience IMO. I believe they call it character building.


He will look back fondly on these father and son times for the rest of his life. The best memories are the ones you can't buy.
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tonytats
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« Reply #30813 on: July 17, 2019, 05:27:21 PM »

I used to buy 10 No 6 for 2/3. That's about 11p in modern money.




These were for people with money or embassy regal !
If like me pocket money was scarce it was players number ten in a red n black packet
Or some weird cig called Carlton which came in 3 different sizes n prices !
Paper round Money was spent on these delights of youth
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #30814 on: July 18, 2019, 12:08:01 PM »

Stopped in a layby yesterday and was amused to find this.


 Click to see full-size image.




I could have used the paint too but I daren't violate the crime scene.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #30815 on: July 19, 2019, 07:18:27 AM »

Like most modern men I moisturise as part of my daily ablutions.

I think it's working.





 Click to see full-size image.
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The_nun
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« Reply #30816 on: July 21, 2019, 01:43:55 PM »

Like most modern men I moisturise as part of my daily ablutions.

I think it's working.


Wow I know it's been a while but you have certainly matured.




 Click to see full-size image.

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RED-DOG
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« Reply #30817 on: July 22, 2019, 09:24:09 PM »

&^%*^%$^%$^*%$*^%*&^%$*^%$*%!

What is it with films starting at the end these days?

"12 men set out on a sabotage mission, only one returned." (Shows you wich one) "This is the incredible true story"
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« Reply #30818 on: July 27, 2019, 12:39:11 PM »

 Click to see full-size image.
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #30819 on: July 27, 2019, 09:41:49 PM »

Is it just me, or do other people absent mindedly try to balance things on end, on edge, or on top of other things?

For instance I'm constantly trying to balance my phone on its side edge or the TV remote on end in the pile of the carpet, stuff like that.




It's just me isn't it?
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« Reply #30820 on: July 27, 2019, 09:48:34 PM »

I was going to include a pic of my  phone balanced on edge until I noticed the flaw in that plan.

 Click to see full-size image.


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booder
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« Reply #30821 on: July 27, 2019, 10:27:06 PM »

Is it just me, or do other people absent mindedly try to balance things on end, on edge, or on top of other things?

For instance I'm constantly trying to balance my phone on its side edge or the TV remote on end in the pile of the carpet, stuff like that.




It's just me isn't it?

Yep    Cheesy
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im not speculating, either, but id have been pretty peeved if i missed the thread and i ended up getting clipped, kindly accepting a lift home.

In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
Martin Luther King Jr
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« Reply #30822 on: July 27, 2019, 10:34:49 PM »

Isn't it great when you discover that you haven't seen seen an all-time classic movie that you thought you had seen?
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RED-DOG
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« Reply #30823 on: July 27, 2019, 10:36:24 PM »

Is it just me, or do other people absent mindedly try to balance things on end, on edge, or on top of other things?

For instance I'm constantly trying to balance my phone on its side edge or the TV remote on end in the pile of the carpet, stuff like that.




It's just me isn't it?

Yep    Cheesy



Nooooo!

There must be more of us.
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Pokerpops
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« Reply #30824 on: July 28, 2019, 06:40:50 AM »

Is it just me, or do other people absent mindedly try to balance things on end, on edge, or on top of other things?

For instance I'm constantly trying to balance my phone on its side edge or the TV remote on end in the pile of the carpet, stuff like that.




It's just me isn't it?

Yep    Cheesy



Nooooo!

There must be more of us.

There’s this guy...

https://youtu.be/rGWwZHBfz7g
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"More than at any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly."
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