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Author Topic: Post bust-out handshakes  (Read 25149 times)
Tal
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« Reply #150 on: August 21, 2012, 09:55:59 PM »

It's been debated to death before, but poker isn't a sport as it's not a physical endeavour, and all sports contain this element.

Anyway, I'm with Dave on the handshake thing and empathising with the person who has lost a hand (as we've all been there - except for Rastafish). Just because you can enjoy winning a large pot - doesn't mean you can't place yourself in the other person's shoes and understand how they're feeling. If someone says "sorry", they don't mean they're sorry that they got there, or that they're sorry their hand was better - they're saying that they're feeling sorry for their current situation - empathising with them.

It's bad enough offering a handshake after you win, but stealing the other guy's shoes is bang out of order IMO.

If anything you should give them a pair. They have to walk away after all.
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« Reply #151 on: August 21, 2012, 10:02:41 PM »

Why couldn't you be both happy you won and sorry you busted the guy in the same feeling.

Loads of times I've said "sorry mate, UL" after getting a little lucky, and someone has said "Are you really sorry?" and I say Yes I am sorry that he lost unluckily, I am however, in the same way pretty dam happy that I got lucky and won. Just don't get it.

In fact I fint people in general pretty dam prickly over gambling, whats the need?

This.

I just can't understand the concept of needing to "get the hell out of there as soon as possible", or saying sorry to someone being so offensive! Really?!
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mondatoo
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« Reply #152 on: August 21, 2012, 10:06:44 PM »

I don't find either of them offensive, never been bothered by a handshake no matter what stage it was at. Just find someone saying sorry a bit bizarre and usually insincere.
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kinboshi
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« Reply #153 on: August 21, 2012, 10:17:03 PM »

Watched an young American qualifier get knocked out by a Norwegian on a 9T62T board (he had 99, the Norwegian had TT) in the early stages of an EPT. It was obviously a bit of a cooler, but the American ignored the hand of the Norwegian who'd stood up to commiserate the young American, pushed his way passing, cursing and bemoaning his luck.

He was slightly more sheepish when he returned to the table to retrieve his forgotten bag that was under his chair. He seemed to regret his lack of decorum previously, and the Norwegian gent caught his eye whilst offering a look of commiseration and the American took the chance to offer his hand and apologised to the table for his behaviour earlier.

Surely the handshake is a better way to leave than the teenage strop?
« Last Edit: August 21, 2012, 10:19:24 PM by kinboshi » Logged

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« Reply #154 on: August 21, 2012, 10:22:24 PM »

I think the hand shake thing is just fine.

Boxes talk trash. Us poker players call it banter/speech/Angle Shooting or whatever.

Just a show of no hard feelings either way. Onwards and Upwards we go.

More early stages of a competition getting lucky is an acknowledgement I got lucky. So offering a hand shake may stop abuse or a smack on the nose.

Final table you may have built a relationship of being matey sitting with the same folk for hours.

Far better to be nice I say.  


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« Reply #155 on: August 21, 2012, 10:23:34 PM »

I feel an "official etiquette thread" coming on

So basically, i can take from these wide ranging canvassed opinions that views are mixed and there is no one over riding view... Thought so.

My most poignant point i'll take from this, which i liked is that i will allow it to be the loser's moment and leave it with them to initiate.
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Tal
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« Reply #156 on: August 21, 2012, 10:30:51 PM »

I feel an "official etiquette thread" coming on

So basically, i can take from these wide ranging canvassed opinions that views are mixed and there is no one over riding view... Thought so.

My most poignant point i'll take from this, which i liked is that i will allow it to be the loser's moment and leave it with them to initiate.


Very nicely summarised.

Although I suspect you mean 'resonant', rather than 'poignant'.

On reflection, I shouldn't have picked you up on that. It's your thread, after all.

Shake on it?
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« Reply #157 on: August 21, 2012, 10:34:04 PM »

I feel an "official etiquette thread" coming on

So basically, i can take from these wide ranging canvassed opinions that views are mixed and there is no one over riding view... Thought so.

My most poignant point i'll take from this, which i liked is that i will allow it to be the loser's moment and leave it with them to initiate.


Fine summary, hopefully 99 % of people are persuaded to the loser's moment thing and will stop thrusting their chubby, germ ridden, smug hands in my direction when they bust me. Can we do another 10 pages - excellent thread
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sola virtus nobilitat
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« Reply #158 on: August 21, 2012, 10:35:35 PM »

I feel an "official etiquette thread" coming on

So basically, i can take from these wide ranging canvassed opinions that views are mixed and there is no one over riding view... Thought so.

My most poignant point i'll take from this, which i liked is that i will allow it to be the loser's moment and leave it with them to initiate.


Very nicely summarised.

Although I suspect you mean 'resonant', rather than 'poignant'.

On reflection, I shouldn't have picked you up on that. It's your thread, after all.

Shake on it?

No.. Poignant is what i meant and still do :-)

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Simon Galloway
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« Reply #159 on: August 21, 2012, 11:22:42 PM »

I feel an "official etiquette thread" coming on

So basically, i can take from these wide ranging canvassed opinions that views are mixed and there is no one over riding view... Thought so.

My most poignant point i'll take from this, which i liked is that i will allow it to be the loser's moment and leave it with them to initiate.


Fine summary, hopefully 99 % of people are persuaded to the loser's moment thing and will stop thrusting their chubby, germ ridden, smug hands in my direction when they bust me. Can we do another 10 pages - excellent thread

Perfectly fine to continue with a decent send-off then.

"Sorry" annoys me when someone has been jumping up and down banging the table and screaming the ten of clubs in... then saying sorry when it arrives.  Otherwise yes, I don't think it's the smartest comment anyway, but I don't find it irritating from someone otherwise well-behaved, even if not particularly convinced they meant it.
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« Reply #160 on: August 22, 2012, 02:20:37 AM »

Why couldn't you be both happy you won and sorry you busted the guy in the same feeling.

Loads of times I've said "sorry mate, UL" after getting a little lucky, and someone has said "Are you really sorry?" and I say Yes I am sorry that he lost unluckily, I am however, in the same way pretty dam happy that I got lucky and won. Just don't get it.

In fact I fint people in general pretty dam prickly over gambling, whats the need?

This.

I just can't understand the concept of needing to "get the hell out of there as soon as possible", or saying sorry to someone being so offensive! Really?!

If we both go all-in and you suck out all you've done is realise the bit of equity you had. Because we are both experienced we know that will happen some of the time and we just move on. If I know that and you know that why do you want to apologise to me for the way things panned out this time? Nod head and say unlucky is more apt because it shows an appreciation of my bad luck without apologising for something we both know is normal. Making a fuss by saying sorry is inappropriate because there is nothing to apologise for. It's like when you get in somebody's way and it is THEY who say sorry, yeah that weirds me out as well.
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« Reply #161 on: August 22, 2012, 03:06:53 AM »

Not sure about the whole hygiene argument. How do you people ever leave the house?
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« Reply #162 on: August 22, 2012, 06:02:47 AM »

Not sure about the whole hygiene argument. How do you people ever leave the house?

....or touch chips & cards (which every other player also touches) with their bare hands, if they are minded not to shake hands with a player because he may not wash his hands after going to the toilet?

 
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« Reply #163 on: August 22, 2012, 06:47:27 AM »

I don't find either of them offensive, never been bothered by a handshake no matter what stage it was at. Just find someone saying sorry a bit bizarre and usually insincere.

The other day I met a guy i knew at school id not seen for like 4 years. I told him it was "great to see him" in actual fact (no offence to him whatsoever he's a nice enough guy) I'd have been perfectly happy to never see or meet him ever again.

Is this insincere of me?
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« Reply #164 on: August 22, 2012, 08:14:38 AM »

As has been said in the thread, it is up to the loser of the hand to offer a handshake, not the winner. It is the loser's moment, his opportunity for a final gesture at the table - whether handshake, comment, or leaving quietly in silence. The winner should melt into the background, quietly stacking his spoils of victory - this is not his time.

Exactly this, I would much rather shake the hand of someone that beat me, outdrew me, sucked out on me with his one outer than the twat that rants and raves about how lucky my opponent was. The day I can't lose gracefully will be my last game.
I remember very clearly a heavy cash game when speech play was frowned upon, a gentleman clearly lost very much more than he could afford, the game lasted well over 48 hours, with a few trips to the bank calmly whispering to me 'Could you lock my seat up for 10 minutes please'. About the 5th time and around £35k later he came back and stated that he was done, went around the table and offered his hand to everyone and with a smile said he enjoyed the game. One very well known British player was losing about £2k and was being vocal to me and the other dealer, refused to shake his hand.
From a dealers prospective there was one prick at the table.
You can't buy class.
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